To the other shore.

Click on the pictures to see enlargements - Music: "Khuc Thuy Du" by Anh Bang.


Our Vu, Hoang and Do families	Vicky Viet thi Hoang: Feb 20, 1919 - January 28, 2005	Thuc(hidden),ThuVan, William, Katherine, o.Bang, Tonia and Viet

Katherine,Thac,Tran, Tonia, William, Viet, ThuVan Father Hau and o. Bang.	Vicky and MintTea (Thuc)-2003	Stephanie (on the screen), ThuVan, William, ba Bang, Le and Van on first row.

***

there is always space

beyond the geographical boundery

there is always the other shore

go! sis... go...

last night

a very brave bird soars

past the river of time.

To our sister, mother, and grandmother

“Me Thuan” has been in a coma for a week tomorrow. All medication and food supply has been cut off. There is a note: (NPO = Nothing per oral) on the wall at her bed head. She looks calm. The change has been slow for the last 3 days: There is a little swelling at the limbs because the body is trying to retain what water is left inside. She breathes with more difficulty, and the heart is still pumping, but there is not enough oxygen coming in for the blood that is slowly getting thicker and contaminated. Otherwise, she shows no sign of pain or discomfort. The nurses say we should be watching for more drastic changes like dehydration of the body, sunken eyes, swelled limbs and/or purple fingertips and nails.

Viet arrived yesterday. He spent all his time now in the Nursing Home with his mom. His wife and children will be here Friday night.

We are all hanging on; We go from being physically tired to being burned out emotionally by the overwhelming experience, but we are in good spirits. As we believe that the hearing is the last sense to go, we continue to talk to her. We are telling her that we will be all right and that we will be here for each other so she should let go of all attachments/worries in order to go in peace. We tell her and explain everything we are doing for/to her. The nurses come to bathe and change her as usual. Time lingers and makes the farewell more intense for us but the serenity of her look assures us that we are on the right path. There is grieving but no guilt or fear. The girls, Stephanie and Kat are doing fine. They cry a little but are calm and aware.

Later Thursday- Still no change (like purple finger nails or sunken eyes), the swelling even went down. Her complexion changes to a darker tone but the skin stays smoothly white like ivory and there are no wrinkles

Stephanie and Kat went to see their grandmother late in the evening and stayed there for a while to pray with their Rosaries.

Last night, Viet had the feeling that his mother would go soon. And she did. Me Thuan passed away early this morning at 2:30.

For 6 hours, the face/head stayed warm as the body temperature leaves the body from the feet up. She looked just as though she was sleeping. Father Hau came to give her the Sacred Oil and the Blessing of the Last Sacraments. We prayed with him. At 8:00AM, when all warmth left the body, we called the funeral home, which came to pick the body up by 8:30.

The visitation and religious service is from 4-7 pm tomorrow. Stephanie is having an exam-competition all day Sat. and won't be able to be there.The cremation will be done the following day.

Saturday, January 29, 2005 See pictures above for the funeral services. Please click here for ThuVan's website with more photos.

The ashes were gathered in a beautiful wooden box with a sliding lid. We brought it directly to the Kwan-Yin Temple. The monk was a 6 foot tall Chinese, with kind words and a baby face. The shelf bore number 58. It's easy to remember since 1958 is a birth date in the family. We also met Me Thuan's adopted son, Thac and his daughter Tran whom we were delighted to welcome in our family. Viet, ThuVan and their 2 children will leave Monday afternoon. We are going to miss them; especially William, who has become a wonderful young man. Tonia didn't feel well the whole time. We wish her a fast recovery.
The ashes will be cast at sea later on, together with my brother-in-law's, as my sister had wished. Viet has planned this for this summer, when everyone has more time. May our "Me Thuan" rest in Peace.