Questions without answers


Jenny Hoang

----There is so much Humility in Peace of Mind. Should Humility come first or is it the other way around?  Or is it Humility a natural side-effect of a mind at peace?
Humility belongs to s/he who experiences the unexplainable sufferings of human lives, that much I can tell.

----Pretending not to see the truth, not expressing or accepting it, seem to be such a waste. It ends up hurting everyone, ourselves first and all the ones involved. The issue is: We all want to be kind and loving to others and we wouldn’t want to hurt their feelings. Should we have to have enough love in us so that we wouldn’t want to hurt ourselves to begin with?

----My Mom is the image of myself 20 years from now if I am still alive then. There are a lot of us in her. Loving ourselves in others is not easy. It’s like walking in somebody’s shoes. We can’t. It is hard enough to buy shoes that fit us

----Am I free to choose? I can’t choose to fly, can I? It is hard to choose to be happy with others, yet I can choose to be happy with myself. So is there free choice? Is there free choice within the limits of one’s own thoughts, speeches and actions? How can one have freedom within something very limited like one’s brain? Talking about controlling the outside world ?

----Mother’s Day. I wanted to give my Mom something valuable but couldn’t really think of anything “valuable enough” that she would care for. On the other hand, I know exactly what she and I could care for; I know exactly what every one of us would care for.

----To become enlightened is also a mean. You have to stay in its Light to face defilements so that they can no longer disturb you; You have to stay in its Light to “see” how much people suffer from these disturbances so that you can “understand” them instead of blaming them. May be to see and to understand are also means. May be the ultimate goal of a life time is to die understanding.

----There is no form of God. There are only Qualities that have been once in us. The Qualities of God are what we call God. To me there are Qualities and non-Qualities also, all in one package. Asked who I wouldn’t like to hang out with, I said: “The ones who complain about everything and the one who are sure about everything. No1 depresses me and No2 brings out violence in me. When asked whom I would be the most comfortable with, I couldn’t really give an answer, I am busy trying to feel comfortable with myself.. How should we deal with No1 and No2 ? Avoid them, forgive them, push them aside? Or change them?

----Are the tendency to control and the need to be approved of.. the ultimate request for fulfillment of the ego self? Can the ego be really fulfilled since its state of separation is a false premise in the first place?

----I remember a question someone asked at a retreat: “Is there artificial happiness?” The teacher said: “When you are hungry, go look for food, don’t eat the menu!”

----Ephemeral excitement versus long lasting peace of mind? What is more real? To hit the Jack Pot or to find out that one is capable of great love, great forgiveness and great understanding? They are both real to me!!

----Gary Snyder wrote on Southwest American Indian Hunters: “They learn to be motionless and to put their mind in an open state so that their consciousness won’t spook creatures that they know will soon be approaching.” Wow! This sounds like a wonderful state of deep meditation. Yet, if they are in such a total state of mind and stillness, would they lose the desire to kill ?

----Would boredom start the search, continue the search and end the search? Boredom could be a very good space to be, provided that one is in control of self. D. once said there might be pleasure in not having control of self sometimes. But I think that kind of pleasure would and could soon turn out to be a real pain also. True or false?

----Love is such a beautiful feeling. Why on earth does it have to be mixed with misery? Thoughts and feelings are close. When pulled and pushed by karmic bonds, they induce misery. Is loving someone or something also karmic? When love is subject to the pull and push of karma is there true love? Am I questioning the love I have for my Mom and for my children? When I see my Mother’s face without any consideration, things become more simple. I just love her and want her to feel loved. Does she?.

----Hurting feelings go around and come around. J.hurt me because she felt hurt. I felt hurt and I am ready to hurt her back or I am going to hurt some one. Yet, the issue is: Do I want to hurt myself in the process? The circle has to stop somewhere. I have to take my chance. It’s the image that hurts. The moments pass, could we leave them in the river of…time?